


Round and Round

by HappyLeech



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Gen, Not quite an AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-20
Updated: 2014-08-20
Packaged: 2018-02-13 23:15:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2168970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappyLeech/pseuds/HappyLeech
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the end, it is Them<br/>In the beginning, it is Them</p>
            </blockquote>





	Round and Round

It is only at the end of everything, the end that even Angels or Demons or Prophetess’s or Witchfinders can’t stop, that Adam gets it.  


Why Pepper grew her hair so long and took up sword play.  


Why Brian dyed his hair after that dreadful oil spill that put the rig out of business.  


Why Wensleydale started slicking his hair back when he took the job marketing diet pills.  


Why They were all amused, but not all that surprised, when They all bought motorcycles.  


So, it was when the world was dying out around Them, when Death did not come for Them, that Adam Laughed.  


The rest of Them felt much like children then. Children left alone in the lingering, fading light that was Lower Tadfield. Children wading in blood and listening to Adam cackle, feeling overwhelmed and underprepared.  


“Where are they?” Pepper asked, remembering everything forgotten, eyes wild, holding tightly to a sword of her making. “The Horsemen?”  


Adam Laughed.  


“Maybe they’ve died as well. There’s not much left, not anymore.” Wensleydale said, holding tightly to a pair of scales he’d grabbed from his office before fleeing the city, although he wasn’t sure why.  


Adam Laughed  


“Don’t be ridiculous.” Brian replied, biting his nails, something now shaped into a crown hanging from his belt. “There’s no way they could die, right? I mean, they aren’t really…well, you know? Besides, there’d still be one left, regardless, right Adam?”  


Adam stopped Laughing.  


And  


Everything  


Paused  


“RIGHT.” Adam said, and They understood.  


“Oh,” said Pepper, looking down at her sword, Wensleydale looking down at his scales, Brian looking down at his crown. “Now what?”  


Adam surveyed the crumbling ground around them, the light around them going out. “NOW WE START OVER.”  


“We- er- you can do that, Adam?” Brian asked, fiddling with his tin crown, and Adam nodded.  


“SOMETHING WENT WRONG. THIS SHOULDN’T BE HAPPENING.” Adam replied, and waved his hand as the Earth fell away beneath them.  


There was a bang.  


The Earth is a Taurus this time around.  


A different agent of Hell is stationed on Earth, and they get everything right. The Antichrist grows up, twisted and spoilt, in the Americas.  


When the Horsemen ride, Adam weeps, but the others do not understand. They are beginning to forget their humanity, Wensleydale first, and He is not surprised.  


There was a bang.  


This time, she’s a Gemini.  


Almost everything is right this time. Crowley and Aziraphale. Adam, Them, Lower Tadfield. But this time Adam cannot hold back the forces of Heaven or Hell, and there is war, to her delight.  


He watches a life that’s no longer his be torn apart, and Brian casts off his humanity with gusto.  


There was a bang.  


A Sagittarius now.  


Pepper has the power this time, and War smiles at the bloodshed she causes.  


“I always was a go-getter,” she tells Death after Pepper sets everything off, years in advance, but he does not smile as she does. Even if she still remembers some of who she was once, it is not enough for Him.  


There was a bang.  


Cancer.  


It’s two demons this time, and everything ends in fire and brimstone. A child who is not Him rules until He can take it no more and everything resets.  


Bang.  


Scorpio.  


It’s two angels now, and it ends even faster in a blinding flash of grace. There is no place for Them in this ruined world, and They actually demand that He change things again.  


Bang.  


Aries.  


An angel kills a serpent at the gates, Agnes Nutter leaves no descendants, and the witchfinders control the parliament. The child is burned in a bimonthly witch hunt, and the Army of Heaven takes that as a sign to start their holy war.  


Bang.  


Capricorn.  


The Antichrist is born ten years later than expected, and a selfish demon does a wicked thing out of fear and affection for which all beings suffer. Famine took delight in this world, with withered crops and withered people, but Death could not feel the same joy.  


Bang.  


Pisces.  


Demons and Angels roam the world, holy wars and demonic clashes crippling the mortals. The Antichrist is hailed as savour and monster, and after 11 short years, lays waste to the humans that scavenge through the ruined world.  


Bang.  


Leo.  


This world is still holding to the values of the Roman Empire, and the Antichrist is the star of the Gladiator Ring. There is no bookshop, no burning Bentley, no divine help, and what should have been called Britain sinks into a bubbling sea.  


Bang.  


Virgo.  


An Angel is given the Antichrist, and he is raised in a household that knows his true purpose. He is killed in early morning, and in late afternoon the world is aflame.  
Pestilence breaths in smoke and corruption, smiling wide as Death turns away.  


Bang.  


Aquarius.  


Them consists of Peter (a Boy), Adrianna (an Antichrist), Bonnie (A Girl), and Wilma (a Girl). An angry Antichrist scowled and all heavenly and hellishly forces are banished from Earth. Retribution follows and she cannot save her world. Still, Death applauds her attempts as he reaps her.  


Bang.  


Libra  


“Does something feel familiar about this to you?” Sable asks, and Chalky shrugs.  


“We _are_ creatures of habit,” Scarlet says, waving the sword at him, and Sable snarls at her.  


Death does not reply.  


Death has been busy.  


He has been fixing things.  


He has not been mucking about, moving construction markers about in the dead of night, in the rain, but He considers His work to be of a similar nature.  


He will not wave His hand this time.  


There will not be a bang.  


The Earth will continue to be a Libra.  


“WE RIDE.” Adam speaks, and the Horsepersons head for their steeds, their motorcycles. They have an appointment in Lower Tadfield, and they need to be just a little bit late.  


He wants this world to survive.  


And it will.


End file.
